What’s for dinner

It is not often I find myself questioning my sanity. Usually, I question the sanity of others. If there’s one thing I am usually certain of, is that I am a rational human being in a world infested with madness. That said, I had a jacket potato tonight and couldn’t stop laughing at it.

I have had many jacket potatoes in my time and never given it much thought. There is almost an endless combination of toppings one can slop over the most popular of the tubers. Beans, beans and cheese, chilli, chilli with cheese, tuna… well maybe not endless, but still.

Because my bank card broke and, in this technological age, one cannot get money or buy things without a bank card, I am unable to buy food. As I work full time and the banks don’t ever seem to want to be open when the general population can visit them, what I will eat in the coming days remains a mystery to me. Why banks open when everyone is at work, close for an hour at lunch and then close at half past five is quite ingenious in many respects. It’s well known that those in work will be the ones with money. If they’re in banks withdrawing their money, then the banks will have less money, and they don’t want that.

Anyway. A broken bank card and no cash is what led me to be eating a jacket potato. With butter… a crack of pepper and a pinch of salt. This, I am assured, constitutes a meal. A single potato.

This solitary spud sat on my plate, steam rising from its scored outer flesh, its innards cooked to a soft and fluffy perfection. I had a potato for dinner.

That’s it.

What are you having for dinner?

A potato.

Oh, very nice.

It’s the only vegetable where this is acceptable.

What are you having for dinner?

A butternut squash.

You fucking weirdo.

What’s for dinner mum?

A single grilled parsnip.

 

This has been my evening. This is what happens when there’s no beer in the house.

 

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One thought on “What’s for dinner

  1. Pingback: The Tiredness that comes from Travel | Lewis Lovatt Writes

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